Adverbially me.

I'm sure you've noticed that my recent posts have been lacking in verbiage. Well, not verbiage, exactly. Lacking in real writing, not just lists of thing I hear around me. I haven't really been writing very much at all, not even in my notebook. There are several possible reasons for this to be happening.

Reasons Why I Haven't Been Writing Much:

• The mothership has become angry with me and used their futuristic devices to block the creative impulses from entering my brain.
• Subtle atmospheric differences are reducing the level of whatever it is in my brain that causes me to write.
• I'm lazy.

They're all very likely reasons, but for some reason I'm going to go with the last one. Sloth, as we all know, is a sin, but who cares?

I'm very tired again today, and I have nothing much to write about. The ideas, they do not flow. The English, it is not coming to me. Non. Je n'ai pas les mots.

Meatballs. The plan was to write about useful objects, so I'm not sure why meatballs are here. Meatballs, being small balls of dead animal substances, are pretty much useless. They say the things are edible, but I'm not sure. Who really wants to put a small ball of dead animal in your mouth? Even the idea sickens me. I hear that Ikea (preferably pronounced IK-ee-uh) makes the best meatballs, but I've never had the chance to find out. Okay, yes, I've had the chance. I'm just vegetarian.

Someone pointed out to me that I put the word the in front of a lot of things. You know: the cousin, the child, the thing, the chick. I have no explanation for why I do this. It's just my way. It's a part of my DNA. If I stopped calling you all the people, I would lose my essential Libby-ness. Yes. I would. If you have any ideas of why I like definite articles so much, please tell me.

This is a song that I have always really loved, so I'm posting the lyrics for you all to enjoy. Remember "Schoolhouse Rock?"

Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs Here

Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, get your adverbs here.
Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, got some adverbs here.
Come on down to Lolly's, get the adverbs here!
You're going to need
If you write or read,
Or even think about it.

Lolly Lolly Lolly, get your adverbs here.
Got a lot of lolly, jolly adverbs here.
Anything you need and we can make it absolutely clear...

An adverb is a word
(That's all it is! and there's a lot of them)
That modifies a verb,
(Sometimes a verb and sometimes)
It modifies an adjective, or else another adverb
And so you see that it's positively, very, very, necessary.

Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, get your adverbs here.
Father, son, and Lolly selling adverbs here.
Got a lot of adverbs, and we make it clear,
So come to Lolly! (Lolly, Lolly, Lolly)

Hello, folks, this is Lolly, Sr., saying we have every adverb in the book, so come on down and look.

Hello folks, Lolly, Jr. here. Suppose your house needs painting -- how are you going to paint it? That's where the adverb comes in. We can also give you a special intensifier so you can paint it very neatly or rather sloppily.

Hi! Suppose you're going nut-gathering; your buddy wants to know where and when. Use an adverb and tell him!

Get your adverbs!

Use it with an adjective, it says much more,
Anything described can be described some more.
Anything you'd ever need is in the store,
And so you choose very carefully every word you use.

Use it with a verb, it tells us how you did,
Where it happened, where you're going, where you've been.
Use it with another adverb -- that's the end.
And even more...

How, where, or when,
Condition or reason,
These questions are answered
When you use an adverb.

Come and get it!

Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, get your adverbs here.
Quickly, quickly, quickly, get those adverbs here.
Slowly, surely, really learn your adverbs here.
You're going need 'em if you read 'em,
If you write or talk or think about 'em ... Lolly! (Lolly, Lolly, Lolly)

Announcer: If it's an adverb, we have it at Lolly's! Bring along your old adjectives, too - like slow, soft, and sure. We'll fit 'em out with our L-Y attachment and make perfectly good adverbs out of them!

(Get your adverbs here!) Lots of good tricks at Lolly's so come on down.

(Lolly, Lolly, Lolly!)

Adverbs deal with manner, place, time,

(Lolly, Lolly, Lolly!)

Condition, reason,

(Father, son, and Lolly)

Comparison, contrast

(Lolly, Lolly, Lolly)

Enrich your language with adverbs!

(Lolly, Lolly, Lolly)

Besides, they're absolutely free!

(Lolly, Lolly, Lolly)

At your service!

Indubitably!

You didn't get much in the way of verbiage today, but you got a very lovely and somewhat obnoxious song. That's a fairly good trade-off, I think. I'm sure Audrey doesn't think so. She gave me several death threats during the course of this blog, like this one:

*quiet seething voice* Blog or I will reach through the computer and throttle you.

Pleasant, Audrey. You make me feel so loved.